i have nO liFe


    (via jackfrostciicle)

  1. onorobo:

    Hey guys!  I was invited to an Eruri artbook called At Day’s End by the amazing Kels with a ton of other artists I really admire. Here’s a tiny preview of the art piece I did for it.


    The price (minus shipping) is $12.00 USD. Pre orders come with your choice of two adorable eruri-themed post cards and end on May 12th!

     I’m so excited for it! Please do check it out : D

  2. "One: Buy condoms. Buy them and keep them with you at all times, and use them before you are asked to use them. And use them every time. The peace of mind you allow your partner will free her to be vulnerable with you, and that, my son, is exactly what sex is about. Condoms are sexy. In fact, call buying condoms foreplay.
    (Footnote: If you are too embarrassed to buy condoms, you are not ready to have sex.)

    Two: Kissing is not merely foreplay. Spend entire evenings making out on the couch while fully clothed. Believe me, dry-humping rocks.

    Three: Sex is not just about friction. It’s about emotion. Stop trying to find her clitoris and find her heart. Because then she’ll help you find her clitoris.

    Four: If you really wanna know how to please a woman, ask her how she masturbates. Then do that. A lot. If she claims she doesn’t masturbate, offer to take her shopping for a vibrator so you can both learn the vocabulary of her body together.

    Five: Don’t put anything in her butthole you wouldn’t want in your own.
    (Footnote: Try a pinky finger, it’s kinda awesome.)

    Six: When you go down on her—and you will go down on her, and if you are my son, you will be amazing at it—tell her how good she tastes. Stop in the middle and kiss her deeply so she knows how good she tastes. Do the same when she goes down on you.

    Seven: A simple Google search will yield 1,327 euphemisms for male masturbation, yet only 23 for female masturbation. If guys spent less time jacking off and more time jilling off, this world would be a happier place.

    Eight: Everything you need to know about the importance of the clitoris is in the movie Star Wars. You are Luke Skywalker piloting your penis-shaped X-Wing Fighter deep inside her trench. Remember: seventy percent of all Death Stars cannot be blown up through penetration of the trench alone. It must be through focused contact with that little exhaust port at the top of the trench. Otherwise, any explosions you experience will be merely Hollywood special effects.

    Nine: Just because you come doesn’t mean she has, so don’t you dare come before her. Focus completely on your partner. Don’t worry about gettin’ yours, you’re a guy. You always get yours. Your job is to make sure she’s gettin’ hers.

    Ten: If sex with your partner lasts no longer than this poem, you are not making love. You are masturbating with her body instead of your hand. Shame on you. Go back to step one. You’ve got a lot of learning to do.
    Love, Dad."

    Big Poppa E., “How To Make Love”  (via kanyequeen)

    Romance is important sometimes.

    (via faunagreyxo)

    (Source: internmarlee, via itsflowever)

  3. muscleluvr2:



    100% very real certified doctor

    the balls enter the vagina when??????

    what do you mean “when”? the entire point of sex is to get the balls in the vagina by whatever means necessary… american sex ed is truly lacking

    Seriously all of it ain’t going in there…*shivers*

    (Source: cumaddict72, via the-absolute-funniest-posts)



    Here it is, as I promised!

    So, my first tutorial I actually put some time into doing.
    I would be ever so happy if people would tell me what they like/don’t like about it so I know in the future how to adjust it. If there is anything you wish to know about it, just ask.
    I know the Pictures look kinda… bad, but I did what I could with what I had and I, atleast, loved the outcome. I have a new pair of “frillies” and I love them and I tried my best to do this tutorial as simple to follow as possible.

    When making this, I used a fabric with cotton/linen mix.
    Thats why it gets so wrinkly so fast, but its still a good fabric for undergarment since it breath and is very soft. This tutorial is a basic, so you can decorate your bloomers as much as you wish and in any way you wish.

    When following this tutorial, I used the pattern for mens torusers to make the bloomers a bit more casual. I also made the waistline lower, since I don’t really like when things are to tight around my waist. I guess I’m sensetive.

    Good luck with your sewing and don’t forget to comment and “follow”. :D


    (via youcancosplay21)

    4.01 // 4.02

    (Source: super-f-r-i-e-n-d-s, via moederes)

  4. parliamentrook:

    "Perhaps I should just get Joffrey to choose it for me. End up with a string of dead sparrow heads around my neck."

    better pictures and sale link tomorrow ($90)

    (via rifa)


    Pusheen the Cat [tumblr | twitter | facebook]

    (via the-absolute-funniest-posts)

    (Source: purestelegance, via boahtoki)